Water, Water Everywhere, Y’all About To Get WET

Let’s be honest, most of the things I write on, it’s just everyday, common sense stuff –

Show up early, over-plan and over-prepare when recording or adding a new band member, be patient with yourself when you’re learning, but dedicate a lot of time to mastering the craft. 

Yeah, duh.

But I’ve been thinking… Can I stretch to something even more simplistic? Something that most people would think, “Holy shit! How did he write 1,200 words on that?” 

Well, nothing is quite as essential as doing this simple… sweet and dumb… manageable thing. 

Mugatu wants you for his new campaign!

D​rink a gallon of water every damn day. 

Become a fish. Drink more than you think you should drink. If for no other reason than the fact that your body runs on water!

You’re going the wrong way!

Why is this a commonly known fact and something that (in a statistic I just made up) only 7% of people do? ONLY 7%!!

This is the most political this column gets. Promise!

I​ firmly believe in the gallon challenge (not the milk version)! I will shamelessly carry around a gallon of water everywhere I go. Why? 

A. Because it reminds me to drink more water

2​. It shows me how much I have consumed throughout the day. 

Haha, the second reason (or reason B) is the reasoning behind not using a hydro flask. Does it look classier? Hell yeah. But I am TERRIBLE about refilling the hydro flask. I mean, I’m God awful at refilling it. How much does it hold? Maybe 24 oz, possibly 32 oz. That’s nowhere near enough water throughout the day! 

There’s a joke here… but imma skip it.

L​et’s rapid-fire a discussion on your health.

  • D​o you have a headache? Drink more water! 
  • D​o your joints hurt? Drink more water!
  • Experiencing brain fog? Drink more water!
  • Having a hard time sleeping? DRINK MORE WATER!
  • Having problems with your skin? Beber más agua.

It literally affects every part of your day! 

M​y roommate and heterosexual life partner Danien, you know the guy!

So handsome

H​e was a badass! He worked on a SWAT team as a paramedic, a nurse and a paramedic (damn)! He would come home and tell me stories about how they would pick up someone and one of the first things they would do is stick them with an IV filled with water. He said that 75% of the time, that would fix the problem! They were just SUPER dehydrated! 

I​ get it, you’re not stupid. You know that water is vital for you. So why are you not DRINKING MORE WATER!?! 

Is a gallon too much? 

No, you should be shooting for a gallon every day. This way, if you’re just short, it’s okay! 

I​ will list some of the terrible things that happen when you’re not drinking enough water. But for those of us with a short attention span, here is a crappy video.

I​f you’re like me and like to read your information, here are some signs that you’re not drinking enough water.

From Curejoy.com

9​ signs you’re dehydrated. 

1​. You feel thirsty often – Duh

2​. You Urinate Less Frequently and Your Urine Is Dark In Color

3. You Feel Constipated

4. You Develop A Weak, Rapid Pulse

5. You Tire Easily And Are Often Confused

6. You Can’t Think And Mood Swings Make It Worse

7. You Have Migraine Headaches

8. Your Skin Remains Tented When Pinched

9. You Feel Lightheaded

If you’re feeling any of these symptoms, I have good news. This is a quick fix, drink more mother f***ing water.

This is a music blog, so let’s make it about music. If you’re hydrated, you recall those lyrics, you remember that chord change. If you’re hydrated, your voice lasts longer and you’re not as tired when you’re up on stage. You can play for longer, you feel BETTER. We’re always glorifying these rockstars that drink gallons of Jack Daniel’s and shoot heroin and still get up on stage.

I’m just going to leave this picture of John Bonham here.

But have you ever seen someone like that up on stage? It’s usually a terrible show. It’s not fun to watch and it’s regrettable. It’s not just the singer. All of us have to do this!! You’re the drummer in a band? You have to TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF! This is such an easy fix for almost everything in your life. 

So that’s how everyone got bird flu!

I get it. Starting a new habit can be exciting, but it is also hard. If you’re having a hard time committing to the habit, try our gallon challenge for only 3 days. The rest of your life seems daunting, but three days is nothing!

If you need the $1, you can contact me. Take note of your skin, your sleeping patterns and your energy level. (You will also notice your frequent trips to the bathroom). At the end of the three days, if you don’t see any change, I will pay you the dollar you “wasted” from buying the gallon.

That’s a world record!

I believe in this so much because it has changed my life. This (and committing to 7-8 hours of sleep every night) has been the best thing I’ve ever done for myself.

Final thoughts

  • Sugar dries you out. In fact, almost everything dries you out! So if you’ve had caffeine or a glass of wine, remember to compensate (just another reason to shoot for that gallon).
  • From SuccessfulSinging.com – “To effectively hydrate our vocal cords, we need to drink lots of water.  This water is absorbed by our stomachs and distributed around our bodies, to where it is needed.  It could take around 30 minutes or more for water to reach our larynx and benefiting the voice, so don’t just drink the moment before you sing.  Make sure you have drunk enough at least 30 minutes before you sing.” – If you’re consistently hydrated, you don’t have to worry about this! Just another reason to drink a TON of water throughout the day!
  • Water is the essence of moisture.

Just in case you’re not getting it.

This is you with a gallon of water in you. DAMN, you look good!

This is you when you’re not drinking water… so sad.

Not drinking enough water is like asking for a plant to bear fruit without giving it any water. It’s kind of silly!

Please, d​rink more water.


Published by crazylegsdean

Self defined as: taste taster for the aspiring musician on the go.

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